Not so Crazy Amy

 Amy was one of the first people I met when I moved to Dallas back in 2003.  We worked at the firm that must not be named and single-handedly caused the abolishment of all company sponsored after work sports teams.  She had started a company volleyball team which played on Tuesday nights at Lonestar volleyball club.  Back in those days Lonestar could be condemned at any minute due to structural safety so they would serve pitchers to anyone for $3.  Since I was broke at the time and she was too we bonded over cheap pitchers of Keystone Light while causing severe emotional distress to another employees girlfriend (later wife).  This girlfriend didn't think her significant other should be having this much fun on a school night and complained to HR about our shenanigans, which immediately cancelled all future sports.  I'm actually proud that my actions caused so many policy and procedural changes there.  
I don't remember the year but Earl and I were roomates; I had a very small black Sony-Erikson phone (same as Parq) and her contact name in my phone was Crazy Amy and it's to this day my Galaxy SIII has the same contact name.  We've taken road trips to Austin, had amazing meals together, partied till the sun came up, and manged to remain friends- even with her shitty taste in music.  Last Wednesday she came over for the dreaded date discussion OR maybe it because I slow cooked lamb shanks and provided wine.  Since at a few different points in our relationship we unsuccessfully tried to sort of date this could have been awkward, but with us humor is always abundant. 

When you go on a blind date or a date with someone you don’t know very well yet what do you look for regarding chemistry?

A:  I haven’t gone on a blind date in several months. The last one I went on, I kept trying to keep the conversation going but he was quiet.  I always look to see how the conversation is moving; what things we have in common, can he hold his own in a regular conversation with me, what kind of music he likes, that kind of thing.

B:  God, you like that shit hole drum and bass

A:  I know, I know, I have a distinct taste in music, but I at least want something in common.  The last few guys I went out with were very introverted. Maybe I'm extra extroverted, I don't know.   I Know my city and I don't like the cookie cutter Dallas persona, we just don’t connect.  A lot of people want to go home and go to work and that’s their life.  I think I have a different mindset.  A majority of the world has a boring mindset.

Do you  know what you want now?

A:  No- I don’t.

B:  Do you know what don’t want?

A:  Yeah- I don’t want someone that has to depend on me. We need to be equal in everything and want more to life. Barely getting by, not struggling, that's not what I want and it's my mission for that not to happen.  I was one of the first in my family to reach 21 and not be married.  I guess I'm never open to a relationship because I'm never been satisfied professionally. 

A:  Some people don't have low standards in their mind but they go with what's comfortable.   They change their lifestyle, move into a house and be ho-hum people. Then are shocked they don’t love what they have become.  I want someone who is successful on their own.  Because of my Lithuanian traditions I...

B:  Polish, you mean polish (inside joke)

A:  In the Lithuanian culture the male is more dominant, but...  I want a dominant male but I also want the give and take.  I don’t want to be a stay at home mom, I’m not a trophy wife kind of person either.  I also don’t know what I want to be when I grow up.

B: You've got time, it took me a while to find something I loved doing.

A:  I always said if I was abducted it wouldn't be for long: "We wanted someone low maintenance; this bitch talks too much, she's always hungry and cold."

B: hahahahaha

B: If you’re changing from friends or thinking about going from friends to dating what changes in their behavior do you look for?

A:  I try to avoid that-

B:  Why?

A:  Because… you don’t want to ruin the relationship.  But when I dated someone who was my best friend I really enjoyed it.  I try to avoid it because I know I would fuck it up.  I would hate to do that.  I run in a very small group of people so you don’t want to date someone's sloppy seconds and you're not attracted because you know their dirty laundry.  They need to open their reach; former heavy drinkers, druggies, no ambition, a lot people just do enough to get by. They can’t think in the future, regulated to the same present day thinking.

 B: Always upgrade-

A: Yeah. If it's the aspirations in your life make those better to help yourself.  It may not have always been successful, but ..

B:  You shouldn't focus on one aspect of your life

A:  But it does provide a ground for things.

B:  How would you describe yourself Politically/ Socially?

A:  I'm not a political person.  If I was to label myself, which I hate doing, I’d be a libertarian.  I'm kind of indifferent- some things, like abortion are a necessary evil, but a terrible choice.  I'm a fence sitter, I can look at the good and the bad of everything.   Right now being a democratic is working for me, but its because of my situation.  I don’t agree about people living off the goverment without focusing on finding work or doing something daily for socicety.  I went out on a date with a huge Ron Paul guy but it  was a turn off.  He was so in to it that it was annoying.  I don’t like anyone that in to anything

B:  Whats the worst thing someone could be focused on?

A:  Republican...  Christ, that's tough though- I hate extremes on anything.

B: What’s your stance on Drugs

A: I obviously… (sigh)… they can be completely un-sexy. So I guess I like natural things.  I have friends whose Friday’s end on Monday morning.  I have different idea’s now about all of that, but I’m not near as depressed as I used to be. I might be the lame one now, going to after hours things but leaving after an hour.  On the real stuff like cocaine I’m not for it.  Cocaine is a no go

B:  I’ve never met someone whose blowed out and thought he was really cool.  Be…

A:  Annoying as fuck- It attracts certain people, I'm a very talkative person now and on it I'd be out of control.  I'm afraid to even get too stoned.

B:  I never liked  weed

A:  I know you don’t.  Drugs are part of my culture.

B:  Do you think that will ever change?

A:  Yeah- but the night life still attracts me. Its starting to fade. I simmered down a bit and now I don't have to go out to do anything.

Describe the best date you've ever had

God. I don’t think I've been on a best date. Unfortunately it was on valentine's day- someone I was dating. Maybe we had broke up but we were on good terms.  I made him a bouquet of wine and candy and I took us to Texas de Brazil. We both fasted all day and were starving. We were fat kids who would always stay at home and eat.  We both were able to experience something new and we were foodies, plus I made the gift,  and everything.  Even though it was me taking care of him and we both enjoyed it . 

What’s your thought on religion/ philosophy?

I don’t know- I grew up heavy in a non-denominational church.  My family was very big into the church; I grew up with missionaries, Wednesday  night service in our house,  things like that.  But then the church basically forced them away. The church became larger and then pushed them out as it became more cliquish. My parents basically said fuck the church.  My philosophy class in College was basically anti-theology and I had an issue with it.  My professor said there are only 3 reasons people believe in religion: It's passed down from generations, it's something they are told can never be questioned, and fills the void in their life. Maybe Freud said that too.  

B:  Why are women never equal to men in religion?

A:  Tradition- women, are supposed to be a servant to the man. I don’t agree with it but I don’t disagree with it on some levels.  The way the world is I'm not expected to make the same as a man or have his responsibilities   I want to be the controlling person, usually, but I don’t want that all of the time.  I like to be the strong person but not the strongest in the relationship.

B:  Do you think religion should be updated for today

A:  Yes. It's old school, and needs updating. So does school!  Life expectancy has increased and the standard of living has changed.  Requirements of jobs have changed and forcing people to find a degrees at 18 while telling them "When you graduate you will be successful, you will win".  It's not true.  They should tell them you'll be broke with sky high debt and living with your parents.

B:  Does seeming me and my situation piss you off?

A:  Yes and no.  I can’t give a definite answer.  I may be struggling at some things but I'm not living on the streets. I'm kind of jealous because I wish I knew what I was good at, maybe I wish that I could've focused less on partying but I lived a good life so far.  It would be nice to make 6 figures, but I’m younger than you. 

A:  So you named it your blog the wrong chicks?

B:  Yeah, because I date the wrong chicks-

A:  well I didn't know what to think and was kind of like...ugh?

B:  I was thinking of something comical and dating disasters is actually the name of it.  You said ugh, so why didn't we ever work out?  We never really dated, just hung out for awhile.

A:  Yeah, we were never doing the same thing or on the same page in life.  For the longest time you were trying to climb the corporate ladder and I wasn't like that, so we were never on the same page.  We kind of clicked early on but you climbed the corporate ladder.   Remember when you were somewhere drinking with that girl attorney and you said "so and so is an attorney in at work" and then something about her being a professional something and I said "A professional whore".  I loved it for the 3 seconds I laughed and then noticed how awkward it was.

We can say shitty things to each other but we get over it...  YOU like shitty music!

B:  No you like shitty music

A:  Our constant is food-we're fat kinds and we like cheese and alcohol and meat.