Nate refers to Karen as the Honey Badger. She has innate ability to be stone faced 24/7 without showing any emotion.... As long as alcohol isn't present. Once you give her a drink or two the most beautiful smile comes out. When she's comfortable with you her face brightens up with excitement and you instantly feel the warmth of the glow she projects around her. At only twenty-three Karen is the youngest person that I've interviewed for this little project. We met on a Monday at Mr. Sushi in Addison and I wasn't the slightest bit prepared; I left my laptop at the house and used a voice recorder without looking at any of the previous questions. I'm also the biggest fat kid when it comes to sushi (or any kind of food) and that definitely distracted me from focusing on the my questions. We started off strong and then we trailed more into comedy and how much she hates Dane Cook.
B: What's the worst date you've ever been on?
K: Where I just want to get out there?
B: Or where you just didn't click
K: There was one...
B: What made it so bad?
K: It was poor planning on his part. He wasn't creative at all about it. The whole dinner and a movie thing is lame. Plus, not to judge, but he didn't have a car so I had to pick him up.
B: Did you know that beforehand?
K: I kind of knew about it beforehand but I didn't really think about it.
B: You thought maybe he'd borrow one?
K; I don't know, it just didn't seem like anything worked from the start. nothing worked about it.
B: Best date?
K: We went to a comedy club. we didn't really do anything special afterwards but I thought he really put forth the effort into finding something I wanted to do and what I like. We went to a comedy club and saw Chris Reid from House Party. Afterwards we had a lot of stuff to talk about and that made it better.
B: What about the perfect date?
K: ...hmmm......It would probably be something like a concert or shared interest
B: Like Michael Bolton and something...
K: Michael Bolton... yeah, you got me (laughing). Even a bad concert would be fun. We could be laughing and drinking at how bad it is. I also like spontaneity and then have something that we could do afterwards and figure it out, just kind of go with the flow.
B: So what are turnoffs:
K: Someone that talks about himself a lot. It's annoying regardless but even more so when you're trying to get to know someone. Like when you're trying to share things with someone but they are just asking you to tell you about them. TMI (Too Much Information) is another one, someone that talks down on themselves, probably someone that gets hammered on date. That wouldn't be cute, unless I was too.
B: Unless it was spontaneous?
K: (Laughing) yeah. Someone that doesn't really have or can keep a conversation going. People that don't have a sense of humor about things.
B: What about Physical things you don't like; if they present himself in a certain way?
K: Have I met them?
B: No, like your mom or sister set you up on a blind date.
K: Somebody that's Bro-y.
B: Bro-y, I like that.
K: Oakley Shades
B: The big ones?
K: Any oakley's, they just aren't cute. I have a thing about white sneakers.
B: The gangster hispanic look, the white K-Swiss?
K: I hate K-Swiss, the ugliest shoe ever! Other than that I'm pretty flexible with style. I think it would be funny if someone wore a tuxedo shirt.
B: What if they went full Tuxedo?
K: I'd like that.
B: How about physical turn ons?
K: Ryan Gosling.
B: That's like the third time he's been mentioned on here. Maily said it, Ana, and now you.
K: Well, he's very attractive but I just think there's something mysterious looking about him. I'm attracted to that.
B: OK, so real world
K: Umpf... Trying to think. Someone with nice teeth, a good build.
B: You don't have a certain type?
K: No, I think I've dated the full spectrum.
B: Black?
K: No
B: Asian?
K: No, ok, maybe not the full spectrum. I've just never been approached by them. Maybe a black guy, but not seriously. I look for someone that just takes care of himself. If they are spending all of their time indoors eating, playing video games...
B: That sounds awesome!
K: Then I'd be turned off fast. I like brunettes...
B: It's funny, I've noticed that most blonde women, well, fake blonde women say blonde guys but Mexican and Asian's that I've talked to say brunette guys. I have a theory on that: White girls see all these models growing up that as are beautiful like Marilyn Monroe and the barbie doll and they want that. So they see a blonde guy and that mate thing kicks in "We'll have the most beautiful babies with blonde hair". But Asian and Hispanic don't have blonde in their culture so they don't ever think about it that way. Like you covet what's close and you're attracted to what you see and what's close.
K: hahaha. Yeah, I think they are like that but then when that one rare gene comes up and the kid has green eyes they are like "oh, that's the most beautiful baby ever".
B: Long term what do you look for qualities?
K: What do you mean?
B: Do you go into something looking for a long term relationship or just see what happens.
K: I don't' really think about it in the moment, but usually I can tell if we don't have a lot in common then its just going to be a short term thing and see what happens. In general I prefer someone that has more long term potential.
B: So what do you want long term?
K: Long term... I've had the worst luck dating and relationships. I think maybe it's been pretty bad. I haven't ever been one to call off a relationship. Not that I didn't want to and I could see that it wasn't working, I wasn't in denial. Sometimes I should break up with them and it's something I need to work on. Its my worst quality. That's what I haven't dated anyone right now. I'll get very introspective when I'm in a relationship.
B: Over analyze it?
K: Yeah, to the point where I'll just be in my head way too much. In reality it's ok on their part but I just think it to death.
B: Do you just freak out so much about it?
K: Yeah. I try to play it cool but really I'm freaking out.
Sushi Break!!!!!
Just for the record we ordered an Eel roll, cajun roll, Mr. Sushi roll, sea snail sushi, salmon roe sushi, and a calamari roll.
K: What are you going to try first?
B: I'm not sure
K: What is that one?
B: Salmon Roe! You should definitely try that.
K: Kind of scared...
B: Why, It's just baby little Salmon you eat. And they are tasty!
K: (Tries it) It's alright, I prefer more variety in my taste.
B: What about life- what are you goals for life?
K: That's a long list. Ideally I'd want....
B: White picket fence, dog, 2.5 kids?
K: No, I don't want kids. I want to be successful in graphic design. I know it's a long shot and I have a long way to go. I want to be someone that's recognized eventually.
B: Do you want to do it on a micro scale, like at your company or are you looking macro and globally?
K: Yeah. I want to move to England for at least a year and experience that. I'll move there in a town home with my dog. Or if not move to Austin. Just as long as I'm happy doing what I'm doing then I'll be fine.
------ Sushi Break part deux----
B: Are you outdoorsy?
K: I love the outdoors. Are you going to order something to drink, something with alcohol?
B: Yeah, sure.
K: Ok, I've just never seen you without a drink in your hand. (laughing)
B: I usually don't drink during the week, so that's why.
And a large Kirin is ordered that we shared... very tasty......
Waitress: here you go, with beer sushi taste better. I
B: What about your Hobbies:
K: Drawing, watching movies, I'm a big arts and crafts person but not that boring shit.
B: So no scrapbooking?
K: No. I just like taking things apart and putting them back together.
B: Like a meth addict, frankenstieing everything?
K: No... I think I get that from my dad. As a kid he was always remodeling and fixing things around the house. I like reading sometimes, listening to music- I do that quite a bit. Running, and playing basketball. Playing tennis, yoga... I tried to take up longboarding but that didn't go very well.
B: Do you have a bicycle?
K: Not a working one
B: Does it have training wheels?
K: It's all rusted and the tires are blown out.
B: There is a bicycle pub crawl in October.
K: You know how ridiculous that is, a pub crawl on a bicycle?
B: I think it sounds awesome. My friend Amy lives in Deep Elum and will probably do it with me. She's part of those bicycle hipster groups where you have to be a fixie to be cool.
K: God. I get so frustrated when people think I'm a hipster but I'm sorry I have really good taste in music and dress cool.
B: Are you a music snob?
K: Not at all. I think any genre of music can have it's bad qualities and bands. I'm more of a comedy snob.
B: I know you said before you like Louis CK, what other comedians do you like?
K: Demetri Martin, Hannibal Buress, Dave Chappelle, Kevin Hart, Bill Burr, George Carlin, Chris Rock... I like most comedians, I guess my hate list is probably shorter.
B: Who's on your hate list:
K: Dane Cook.
B: I knew you were going to say that.
K: Why, do you love Dane Cook?
B: No, But I appreciate what he's done for comedy.
K: WHAT HAS HE DONE FOR COMEDY?
B: He developed his own genre, he was regularly selling out Madison Square Garden and then had a lot of shows down on Hollywood. Back when he started all you could hope for was to do clubs and then get a sitcom. The only comedians people knew at the time that hadn't died were Tim Allen or Jerry Seinfeld. You couldn't do comedy and make money or keep it up as an actual career. He also used social media to spread comedy which was a first due to the infancy of the internet.
K: Do you think that's a good thing, because afterall they are following his comedy?
B: I'm not a Dane Cook apologist by any means- and I see what your side but the people might have gone to just see Dane but he came up with Bill Burr, Patrice, and some other amazing guys who were also there. That exposes them to so many other great comedians. I haven't heard his comedy since 2003 so I don't know how relevant or good it is today.
K: I just think his comedy is very gimmicky:
B: I watched a Patton Oswald set from 2005 that was basically 45 minutes of trashing Bush, that's not at all relevant now and was very much the go to gimmicky trend thing to do then. I think you have to compare today's material to today's material with anyone.
(Side note. Comedy has grown a hipster gene quick. The UCB/ Meltdown followers are the worst at it. For some reason they feel "alternative" comedy is more pure or enlightened . There are a lot of great comedians in that group like Maron and Pete Holmes but those are also the guys out on the road who can make anyone laugh and don't have set strictly tied to video games, cats, and sucking at sports.)
K: What attracts me to comedy is when it comes from something that is probably pretty dark. How the comic's perspective and switch it around.
B: Any of the storyteller comedians have more of an art to it than the one liners for the masses that seems dumb down. I don't care for Seinfeld's "What's the deal with Mayonnaise" kind of humor and People like Robin Williams just beat me down.
B: What about female comedians?
K: I'm Ok with most but I feel female comedians tend to rely on sex jokes too much. Dick jokes aren't smart humor. Anyone can make a sex joke or a dick joke.
