Intro

A little background info first:   I moved to Dallas in November 2003 from Austin.  Making the transition from the Austin Wakeboard scene to the corporate life of an attorney firm in Dallas at 24 years old was shit.  Austin's free thinking spirit lends itself to the lack of judgement based solely on looks or first reaction where as Dallas pride's itself in judging others by their appearance and material possessions.

Dallas is the brand whore of Texas; ripe with 30K millionaires who drop $500 at the hottest spot on a Saturday night only to slinker back to their 1995 Corrolla missing a headlight, fully utilizing the primer, black, maroon and teal paint job (See example of said people on the right).  The women I met were equal to their male counterparts in flaunting the latest Marc Jacobs/ Sam Moon knock off with Jimmy Choo heels while eye fucking gold cards at the bar.  At the time my Vans/ DC inspired wardrobe and Nissan Exterra did nothing to draw their attention.  Now, in Austin I was always able to talk my way into these initial conversations by saying something witty or inteligient, in Dallas I wasn't able to finish a sentence before the arbitrary boyfriend reference would come out and an indifferent yet overly bored facial expression would appear as they walked away.  Another noticible difference in the two cities is Dallas people don't have house parties or gatherings that don't involve meeting at a bar.  For someone that prides himself on conversation the overwhelming blast of drum and bass didn't allow for decent dialogue.

In the last 10 years not a lot has changed.  With a few exceptions here and there I’ve “dated” the same 3 or 4 girls in rotation and have yet to find a decent steady girlfriend.  I never thought about it until I had my annual birth control meeting with a friend (Thanksgiving at her place- also a former ex-girlfriend from a long time ago) of mine who is married and has two kids, a two year old and the other who is 11 months old.  She asked when I was going to settle down- I made my standard remark in jest about me being the most important person in my life and then we talked in detail about it.  Maybe it was the wine and her lack of recent drinking which led to such an honest and open conversation. We determined that: 

1      

1.     1.  I date the wrong kind of women
2      2.  Besides her, I always go for the wrong kind of girls and need to re-do my priorites

2      3.  I’m too much of X and not enough of Y; x being everything opposite of Y

3      4.  I’m on the wrong continent

With that conversation fresh in mind I went to a BBQ the next day and another friend of mine basically said the same thing later that night.  We went over my dating history and it was absolutely hilarious some of the events and actions that went on.  This made me want to ask women what they thought about their relationships.  So I did what I do best and took a poll of a few of my single female friends.  It was a two part question: The first part was describe your dream guy and the second part was describe your realistic match.  Here are the results with my comments after...

FT:

"Genuine, hard working, playful, travel minded, gumption, good looking, adaptable to society's changes, generous, and realistically I think I can get them all in someone. oh yeah- you know my guy is a white dude".

note: FT is black so let that stupid white guilt subside about the race.

Thoughts: It surprises me there isn't more descriptive physical elements in here.  Knowing FT and how demanding she can be there are a few types she dates and this generalization could be a huge range of people.  I think there is a lot left off here, way to vague for someone so specific in most other aspects of her life.... 

Attributes in Common: 4/9

GZ (this was a direct copy and paste from the email :

In no particular order, just rattling things off and I'm probably forgetting some:
TallSmart (college graduate / uses proper grammar / spelling)FunnyBroad shouldersHas a well-paying jobHas a carOwn place to liveLoves sports / plays sportsLoves animalsHas tattoosHas long-ish hairLikes to drinkLikes to go outAlpha male-typeClose to familyLoyalLikes live musicSizeable dick :)Good kisser / in bedPassionateCharmingOutgoingNot controlling or needy

Thoughts:  This is more of what I was looking for- It's very descriptive while listing physical, emotional, and financial aspects of her dream guy.  This is more of what I think women really think about and list when determining the "would ya" question and GZ has her's down.  

Attributes in common: 12/ 23

DZ: 
Dream guy: Blue Eyes, in shape, sweet, funny, sensitive, no kids or has grown kids, tall, blonde, handsome, beard, and artistic.  A photographer would be cool and white.
Realistic: Shorter but still a tad under 6', in shape and still works out but probably has a beer belly, mechanic, funny, sweet, brown hair, balding, 2 kids under 6, beard, white, likes movies and stays up playing stupid video games till 1am, and low self esteem.

Thoughts:  The last one had me rolling- knowing her and the type of guy she dates the realistic one was what she goes for.  Normally I find that most people lie to themselves in what they go for but with her she usually dates the realistic guy.  She's also Mexican so the white guilt retards can again relax.

Attributes in common: 8/23

FC:
Dream: Tall, HOT, rich, a chef
Realistic: Other than smart.. responsible and respectful... NICE, I'm tired of assholes. Plus I have to like him.

Thoughts:  FC was the first one to mention having a bond or cohesion with their mate.  She has guys fawn over her frequently but she doesn't like any of them; recently she went out on a date and the only description she could give was boring.  As funny as she is and quirky I would have expected to see humorous on here but it wasn't.
That brings me to something else.  It doesn't seem like dating is really popular in Dallas; people hang out or date after they're together but dating in the traditional sense is dead here.

Attributes in common: 2/9

Conclusion: 
Since I haven't dated any of the above; mathematics prove we've made the right choice.  I sent the request to a few of the girls that I have dated and for some reason none replied, I wouldn't have taken any of it personally but they just didn't feel comfortable doing it.  Or had better things to do than answer my retarded texts...
Wading through a lot of the junk and BS I believe the most common attribute was self sufficiency.  Most everyone named some quality that referred to being stable while being able to provide for the other person.  When I polled guys the first 5 or 6 items were physical in nature- women, being the more introspective, chose emotional based items when they were being honest.  Although almost all girls want a guy at least 6' tall which leaves my 5'8" ass stuck like chuck.  Personally I love dating tall chicks, I had an ex that was 5'11 without heels and it was awesome.
This coincides with my thoughts about how a girl will justify dating a gay with below average looks based on an above average personality while a guy will justify a 65 IQ with her 8.5 physical rating. 

My Dream:
Latina, long black hair with a slight streak of blue or purple, 1 blue eye and 1 green eye, body like Salma Hayek, lawyer, spontaneous, loves to travel, elusive to those that don't know her, humorous, kind/ warm, speaks 3+ languages, no kids.



Realistic: single, less crazy than me, stable, some ambition, max of 1 kid, has hair on her head, less crazy than me (x2), height weight appropriate, likes to travel.

Basically unless I move to Central/ South America I'm fucked in finding someone...